It’s autumn. I get it. Trees, leaves, wind, decorative motherfucking gourds, all that. I like autumn. I do. I like leaves, too! They’re pretty as hell this time of year, and they’ve been exceptionally pretty this season. I’ve loved taking the boys for walks and pointing out all the different colors. I’ve given the boys […]
Leafblower, at 7:30 am on a Saturday morning. Sure, why the hell not? I’LL TELL YOU WHY NOT, YOU FRICKEN PRICK, IT’S SATURDAY MORNING AND THE LEAVES WANT TO SLEEP IN, YOU GODDAMNED DOUCHE CANOE
Leaf blower, buzzing voice of damned souls You cannot go to hell fast enough You and your little weed wacker friend, too.
Oh! Leaf Blowers! I remembered to close the windows, Where my sleeping babies lay, Still, up yours all the same.