Okay, so we’re home. All four of us. We are a family of four. FOUR. I don’t know how this happened.
Dave and I are both home and we are getting adjusted to round-the-clock feedings, 12, 3, 6, 9, am and pm. Right now, it’s a two person job. Cascadian starts complaining a half hour before feeding and tries to eat his own hands. I’ve seen him try to eat his brother’s head, also. But the great thing about that boy is that he sucks down his milk like a champ. At three in the morning, getting food into this kid in ten minutes feels like winning the goddamned lottery.
Loyal, being smaller, is much more pokey when eating. In the hospital, we fretted when it took 45 minutes to an hour to bottle feed him. Sometimes he wouldn’t finish at all. He would simply zonk out in the middle of his bottle. Once in a while, the nurses needed to finish feeding him with a tube down into his stomach.
But then, Loyal had moments where he positively gulped down his food, rivaling his brother. We could hear big, giant swallows, like the way Dave drinks his beer. After 20 to 30 minutes of dishearteningly slow eating, he sometimes perked up and polished off a bottle at astonishing speed. Like it was a Mirror Pond Pale Ale.
As he’s gotten bigger, Loyal is still a slower eater, and sometimes he seems to sleep through his entire meal. But the super slow, agonizing feeds seem to be behind him. He now usually finishes within half an hour, and sometimes much sooner.
The quicker we get food into these boys, the more calories they conserve, and the more they gain weight.
I pump after each feeding to have some breast milk ready for the next chow wagon. Until my milk comes in, we bottle the pumped milk and top off with formula. I’m producing enough to feed one kid. We are practicing at breastfeeding, but it may be a while before I’m able to breastfeed exclusively. It seems like maybe I ought to feel weird about writing about my boobs on the internet. But I’m sort of not.
Boobs, internet, boobs.
The ultimate goal would be to breastfeed both at the same time. I am keeping an open mind, but I honestly have to say, it seems like an insurmountable goal. I know women have been able to breastfeed twins by themselves. And I have to go find those stories. I’ll need to get educated and I’ll need support. We are considering hiring a post partum doula. I’ll need a cheering squad to keep my morale up.
Go, boobs, go!
Finally, I have to thank all the friends who have brought us food and meals since we’ve been home. And all the friends who are lining up and picking days to bring over dinner. I just…I can’t thank you all enough. I never expected all of this support, and it has been such a huge help. The hours between feedings, each only one and a half to two hours, have become precious, and we scarf down food when we can. So to have a parade of friends bringing us meals has been an absolute life saver.
So, thank you, thank you, thank you. I love you all. If I could, I’d sloppy french kiss you all, with lots of tongue, but in a totally platonic “just friends” sort of way.