I hear this a lot and I usually say “I don’t know how we do it either.” I’m not just being flippant when I say this. I really don’t know how we do it. But at the same time, we don’t know any better. We have always had two babies. We have no idea if this is easy or hard. We’ve never had experience with only one baby. Though we could venture a guess that taking care of just one baby would be a gentle, springtime breeze compared to the raging shit storm we’ve got with twin boys.
When people say I can’t imagine twins, I think they are probably talking about doomsday-worst-case-scenario situations. Like, both babies screaming their heads off at the same time. After, say, you’ve changed, fed and otherwise attended to them. Like, it’s a statistical improbability that two babies are screaming demon-spawn howls, together in the same house, at the same time, because they are dying or otherwise uncomfortable. With one screaming baby, you might wonder how such a little thing could scream so loud and persistently. But with two, you just have to stop and say, come on guys. Seriously?
It doesn’t happen very often. But total double meltdowns do occur. The mythical doomsday-worst-case-scenario, with stereo screaming babies, it really does happen. When they have eaten more than you thought possible. When they have peed and pooped multiple times. When they should be napping, but would rather be yelling. When you yourself haven’t eaten in half a day, and you have desperately needed to pee for the past three hours. When every spare second is a juggling act between three or four different tasks. When you have to stop every once in a while and take a little mental vacation in order to keep your sanity. I have to remember how cute these buggers are when they are happy and smiling, so I don’t run out the door, never to return. Those days do occur. Today is one of those days.
I realize I am reciting new parent complaints from time immemorial. It makes me feel slightly better to whine about it on the internet.
So, no I don’t know how we do it either.