From the Blog

Theft Deterrent

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One of my neighbors, one of the good, cutie pie neighbors, has had a problem with people stealing his car cover. His car is always shiny and immaculate and he’s quite good at making me feel like an inadequate and neglectful car owner. Like the state’s Car Protective Services Department will come and take my car away for not washing off the bird crap.

I guess he’s had 3 covers stolen in the past few weeks. On the last cover replacement, the shop didn’t have a lock. So he put the cover over the car, jacked it up, and tucked the cover under the tires. Fairly theft proof, you’d think. But no. It was gone the next morning.

So my neighbor is spitting mad, and convinced this elaborate spate of thefts could only be caused from an anonymous personal vendetta. How would you steal the cover when the car is parked on top of it? Except to jack up the car yourself?

So. He’s going to buy another cover. He’s resting up, and he’s planning to go nocturnal this weekend. He’s going to find a vantage where he can observe his car all night. Behind a building, or in the bushes, or maybe in a neighboring car. He’ll have a camera and catch the culprit in the act.

He was saying he might even wait in his OWN car. Put the cover over and wait for someone to pull it off. And he’d be inside! SURPRISE MO FO!

Now. Could there ever, in the history of the human race, be a more appropriate time to wear a gorilla suit?


  1. Does he have a paint ball gun?

  2. loves2wander says

    Hope the thief isn’t an avid blog reader.

    Plan foiled.

  3. so… how did this all turn out? i’ve actually been DYING to know…

  4. He didn’t end up waiting to catch the thief. He just parked a little further away in a “nicer” area. Because NW is the hood, yo.

    I wanted to see the gorilla suit too, e.

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