We Live Near The Coast

You know what we have here on the coast? Sea birds.

After a quick grocery trip, we emerged from the store to find our car had been bombed.

What was remarkable about this was that there was just so much crap on my car, all at once. Was it from a flock of birds? If so, how did they all hit my car at once? How could their aim be so precise?

Was it one big bird? If so, what the hell kind of bird poops that much? Was it the Enola Gay? What the hell did it eat? Was it a whole fish? Like, a tuna or whale or something?

It’s embarrassing to drive around with that much poo on your car. My next stop was the new car wash that just opened in town. I am guessing they will do a brisk business.

Comments

  1. Were you under a tree or power line or something they could have been perched on or was this a fly by bombing?

    • I believe this had to be a fly by. No trees, no wires. But so, so precise. I was trying to remember if I had some kind of karma coming my way, but I don’t recall that I crapped on someone’s car.

  2. FlamingAtheist says:

    Blame tourists that feed gulls, they swoop in and happily crap on everything. In Galveston I hated parking on the seawall since some idiot would start tossing out bread and ruin my relaxing afternoon. Revenge is fun though, if they wander off to the beach I’d cover their car in bread.

  3. What a shitty post! (ba dum bum *ting*)

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