From the Blog

This Is Going To Change Everything

As we were first getting used to the idea that I was pregnant, technically known as the “Oh Shit” Phase, I wondered about how to write about my experiences. I know there is no shortage of preggo blogs and mommy blogs and earnest, heartfelt, indulgent blogs where people talk about their feeeeelings.

It’s actually an amazing popular genre. I have never waded very far into the fetid swamp of mommy blogs because they scare the shit out of me. I know there are wonderful, supportive communities out there. But there has never been such a vibrant, seething pit of outrage and hellfire as when mommies start judging other mommies online.

I knew I was going to write about being pregnant. And having the kid. And then the stuff we do with the kid. And the places we go with the kid. I thought about starting a new blog, because up until now, Mile73 wasn’t a blog about babies or diapers or poo or spit up or other bodily functions. I was going to try to write about “baby” stuff separately, and I started to think up strategies for a separate blog, while continuing to write about my “usual stuff” at Mile73.

But then. Then, after a trip to the emergency room on the day after Christmas (which I will write about soon), we discovered we are having twins.

Oh shit. Holy crap. Oh shit.

It took days and weeks for that news to sink in. It took about a month for me to really fully examine my feelings about it. For all my endless blatherings, I usually freeze up in the face of momentous, earth shattering changes in my life. It’s one of those instances that remind me: I don’t really know myself as well as I think I do. I don’t have the ability to recognize, never mind articulate, that I sometimes withdraw, turn into a zombie and need to “process.” Much of December and January was dedicated to my zombification. My posts here were rather light because I was a bit, um, preoccupied.

Even as we were excited, and sharing the news with my sister and a close inner circle, I was still a bit frozen about the full enormity of what it meant to have twins. I saw my sister’s face as we told her the news, racing from realization to realization and she said, “This changes everything.”

From a writing standpoint, this transition is going to be a big, big part of my life. Really, my entire life. I’ll be the same person. I’ll write with the same voice. I’ll very likely have much more to be snarky about. But I think I’d be fooling myself if I thought I’d be able to separate this giant new experience into a separate writing venue, while still writing enough on this blog to keep it interesting.

I know that not everyone will enjoy the additional subject matter. I may talk about my boobs. Not in a tantalizing, sexy way, but in a farm fresh dairy cow sort of way. I know I will be apt to talk about my feeeeeelings, because even in the first part of this pregnancy, it has been a bit of an unpleasant roller coaster. I will likely talk about having kids, but keeping the amount of crappy, cheap baby “stuff” to a minimum. We are still dedicated to reducing the amount of crap in our lives, even when we bring our little crap machines home from the hospital.

As much as we know everything will change, we want to hold onto the fundamentals in our lives. We want to take our kids camping. We want to take them out to festivals and street fairs. We want them to love nature and we want them to love riding the bus. These are going to be our kids, after all. If they aren’t demanding poutine by the time they are one year old, Dave might certainly have cause for suspicion.

It’s a big change. I’ll have lots to write about. I hope you will stick with me.

 

Comments

  1. FlamingAtheist says

    Congrats and good luck.

  2. Dear heart, you have an entire tag category entitled “My Ass” which includes this post. If that chased anyone off, they are weak souls who shouldn’t be on the Internet anyway.

    However, if the background goes pink fluffy flowers and you change the fonts to anything script and/or comic sans and you start referring to Dave as DH (darling husband), I will drop you from my feed reader.

    Not that I think you ever will. Just sayin’, is all.

  3. Aunty Laurie says

    How could we not stick with Anyone who would describe their Boobs, “in a farm fresh dairy cow sorta way”?!?!?! HAHAHAHA Kids or no kids you’ll never lose that snarky, unique way of putting things into perspective that we Love So Much!!! We’re here for ya!!!

  4. I would think anyone with kids will appreciate a blog about having kids, but also be intrigued by the less experienced, TWINS. Twins are exciting!

  5. Do the twins have a say in this? Afterall, they are stuck sharing accommodations for 9 months, may have already picked out the color for their room (my older daughter was apparently in touch with her yet to be born sister when she declared the soon to be baby’s favorite color was red), and might even have some advice for their soon to be parents. All those kicks and elbows are really morse code……..let’s hear a bit from *their* standpoint!

  6. For sure!!!
    I am excited to see how you and your family blossoms in this new adventure!

  7. I sure as hell will. I don’t think of myself as a Mommy Blogger, even though the blog started out as a place to vent after having our son, it’s just my place to write what I want. Yes, since I gave up the working outside the home thing lots of what I want to talk about has to do with kids. If I hadn’t had them and spent all day at work I’d probably have a thing or two to say about careers and my profession in general, etc. It’s what’s in your brain that wants to come out. Let it out. I wouldn’t worry about scaring people away because then you’re self-editing in a major way and stifling your original voice. You’ve got a great voice, don’t stifle it!

  8. As a mother of three, just be assured that . . . um, that . . . um, NO ONE knows what they are doing at first, that YOUR intuition is your best guide, and get LOTS and LOTS of sleep BEFORE the babies arrive (you won’t sleep soundly again for at least 18 years!) Congrats.

  9. I will admit, that after your “bombshell”, my thoughts were, “Ach du scheisse!” Party over. Heather just won’t be HEATHER! You know, HEATHER! Well, it’s going to be all right now. It’s starting to sink in, and after the initial shock has worn off…. yes, it’s still Heather, and you know what? YOU ARE GOING TO BE A TERRIFIC MOM! Dammit! I wouldn’t want to miss a minute! Stickin’ to it!

  10. I’m totally with Gayle – you are YOU, and that’s why I read your blog. Most of the new moms I know are in their early 20s and are all caught up in stuff stuff STUFF. I’m in my early 30s, and we haven’t pulled the baby trigger yet. I am really looking forward to hearing about your experiences!

  11. Absolutely reading every word you write. I love how you say what you’re really thinking. Your writing is very entertaining and I am happy to follow you for years and years! Good luck in the growing babies stage!

  12. I have a couple of favorite blogs written by parents with the desire to shield their offspring from the material corruption some of us revel in. And certainly dedicated to providing adventure as well. All this with a respectable infusion of snark. bumfuzzle | living, sailing, procreating (www.bumfuzzle.com) and Sereia Rides Again (www.svsereia.blogspot.com), the latter regrettably hasn’t had any posts in a couple of years. Okay, they’re both about sailing families, neither of which started out as families. However they prove that snarkiness can prevail in the face of overwhelming cuteness and sopping emotions.

    Looking forward to your version!

  13. Thank you all for your lovely, supportive comments. I promise to balance any syrupy sweetness with equal amounts of snark and baby crap stories.

    You guys are the best!

  14. You know, this kinda explains why you needed to school that little drag racing punk a couple of weeks ago. I am SO looking forward to your perspective on gestation. This is gonna be a hoot!

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