From the Blog

File Under: Nuts, Running Around Like

Okay, so: Hello internet. I see you still exist even when I go away for a week or two.

We have been running around like nutty whack-a-doos. Dave starts his new job in Portland *today.* Huge. This was the first big piece that needed to fall into place in order for us to move back to Portland. This was a job he really wanted, and one that where he will learn more about stuff he actually wants to know, which is pretty much the best thing you could hope for in a job. I even hemmed some new pants for his work wardrobe. See? I’m domestic. I was happy to do it. It worked out nice until I lost the needle I was using on the floor, and Dave stepped right on it. So the lesson, I guess, is that domesticity hurts.

I’m currently in Astoria, beginning to pack. We have a line on an apartment we want, and we should be getting that wrapped up early this week. That will be the next big piece to fall into place. We are looking in a neighborhood we’ve never lived in before, but should be really great for low-car life with two babies. We are fricken excited.

It’s a bit less space than our current place in Astoria, which is 1600 sq ft, with about 500 sq ft in closet space. But we are used to small spaces, and we still don’t have a lot of stuff. We are hoping to not go crazy with baby stuff. People roll their eyes about “baby stuff,” and remind us that babies just need SO MUCH STUFF.

I get where this idea comes from, but we are going to do our best to not fall into this trap. They are just going to be little blobby dudes for the first six months or so. They aren’t going to know how much “stuff” they “need.” We’ll just stumble into that and learn as we go.  Also, I want to keep the baby stuff to a minimum because so much of it is fricken FUGLY.

So once the place is secured, I have to plan the movers and moving day, set up electricity, get internet, etc. All those moving tasks. Unlike sane people, I actually sort of like all the excitement of moving. There’s always enough time in between moves that I forget what a pain in the ass it is to move, and I only remember the excitement of exploring a new space. After about a year or so, I actually get itchy to move, even when I may like where I am. Perhaps I need therapy.

Anyway, we expect we won’t be such rolling stones once the babies come. The little buggers are probably going to make us settle down.

A few other things. I’m repainting this old chair. Remember that? I barely did, and it was staring me in the face every day. I had a vision for how I wanted this chair to look, a light blue-grey and soft white piping. I sanded it, then I primed it. Then six months went by. I don’t know what happened. I guess, you know, stuff happened. I think I got a taste of how big a pain in the ass this project was, and I procrastinated. It was like DIY and yoga combined.

A few weeks ago, I got a bug up my butt to finish this damned chair, especially knowing I’ve got little blobby dudes coming, and a rocking chair would be nice to, you know, rock them in.

However, after all the time that had passed, I was no longer inspired by the grey/white idea. I went back to the store and got a screaming bright sunny grass green. That is the color I am painting the old antique chair. I know many people would find this blasphemous. And you can imagine the shits I give about being blasphemous. I like the screaming bright sunny grass green. I love it, actually. It’s going to look awesome in the babies’ room.

As I was painting the chair yesterday, I noticed some old antique wads of gum stuck to the underside. I painted right over them. Come on. You would, too.

Finally, in this list-posing-as-a-blog-post, I tried on some maternity jeans that my mom got for me at Christmas. When I opened them, they were HUGE. HUUUUGE. I never thought I’d get so big that I actually would fit in them. I mean, I knew it would happen, because I was going to get HUUUUGE myself. But I was just in denial, looking at those enormous jeans.

I put them on this morning, and they now fit. The HUUUUGE jeans fit. They are loose, but comfortable. And for crap’s sake, I’m at 20 weeks. HALFWAY there. I might have to get HUUUUGER jeans. I’m going to have to shop at REI in the tent section to find something to wear.




  1. Meredith says

    Yay for home projects! And stay comfortable. Out of 8 pairs of pants/jeans, only 1 fits comfortably these days.

  2. Your tweet says: ?The place we are hoping to move into doesn’t allow pets. So now it’s hard to pack all the kitty toys still hidden under our furniture.” Why would you even THINK about moving into a place that won’t take your cat?! xo

  3. Hi Bettie, our kitty died a few months ago.

    We wanted to get another kitty or two once we moved, but our priorities have shifted a little. We are taking a place that will be perfect for babies, but they don’t allow pets. The pet thing was nearly a deal breaker. But we know we won’t be there forever. We want our kids to have pets in their lives.

  4. My big tip is to borrow the big junky toy stuff. Oh, it’s stuff you’ll need, trust me, but only for a few months or so. Cribs, high chairs, strollers, changing table–that’s what you’ll have to own as you’ll need them for a few years. But the bumper jumpers, exersaucers, bumbo seats, swings, and such are here today, gone tomorrow.

  5. Oh Heather, let’s blame fried-up brain for forgetting your kitty had gone to the big wild mouse-catching garden in the sky. It’s just I have you and Dave inextricably bound up with image of Kitty in Dave’s lap in Occupy Dave. Have I said I’m sorry? Well, I am. xoxo BTW, I can’t wait to have you back here in PDX although we never were able to do the Astoria “antique” hunt.

  6. “like DIY and yoga together” this is the PERFECT description. perfect!! it is one of the reason i no longer refinish furniture. I have my moms bedroom set. it’s 5? pieces of furniture, plus an astounding # of mirrors that attach to things. I got it all primed, and then completely lost my wind. it is all piled up in the garage. waiting for me to get motivated again. le sigh.
    and yeah, with twins you are going to become larger than you thought it was possible to become, lol.

  7. Heather, I have been reading you for a long time. Big fan. You are the funniest writer I know; you make me laugh every time. But never before have I involuntarily spat vino all over my computer screen, and I did today. It was the line about how many shits you might give about being blasphemous. I just thought you might like to know how much I love your blog. I CAN’T WAIT for the blobby dudes to arrive. Congrats from Alberta, Canada.

    • Karen, thanks for reading! Sorry about the wine and your computer. But since you are reading in Canada, it means this blog is international! Yay!

  8. Remember when you were worried you would lose your fans when you started talking about babies? Yeah totally off. I almost believed you too. I agree with the sentiments Karen shared above! I just hope you can sneak in some blogging time to share your adventures when the little blobby ones are here :)

    • Aw, you guys. I wuv you. Thank you. :-)

      Also, the month we announced the twins, February, was the biggest traffic month I’ve ever had. I’m going to write about nothing but baby poop and dairy boobs from now on.

  9. antique gum! I totally wouldn’t have painted over it, but you made me laugh, too.

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